Guiding Framing and Questions:

Scholar Tema Okun’s article “White Supremacy Culture” makes conscious attitudes and behaviors in organizations and individuals that perpetuate white supremacy. As we as a collective think and feel into this moment, we are called to return to particular themes in her work to better ground us in vision and action. In particular, we are interested in considering 2 themes emerging as patterns in this time: “sense of urgency” and “white saviorism”.

Whether or not you are familiar with Okun’s work, or these particular terms, we invite you into dialogue with us. You’ll find a link to Okun’s article below.

  • What patterns of white saviorism do you notice emerging in this moment? What tactics do you and your communities mobilize to disrupt and transform these patterns? How do these patterns interact with other aspects of your identity, such as gender, class, ability, age?
  • Okun describes “sense of urgency” as a set of white supremicist tactics in which long term vision and complexity are sacrificed in the service of expediency and, ultimately, reinforcement of those in power. How do we discern when we are enacting patterns of white supremacy in ourselves and our movements versus when we are acting in alignment with justice and collective liberation – for instance, where is the line between a “liberatory” amount of urgency during a mass crisis and the urgency that reinforces white supremacy?

Resources/Suggested Readings:

Dialogue Notes:

These are rough, uncut, unfiltered, and anonymous notes taken at the dialogue. We get that these may not be very readable to those who were not in attendance at the dialogue, and, honestly, sometimes even to those of us who were. We still feel it is important to keep them available as part of our accountability process and for archiving and reference purposes.  Some of these notes have been digested/transformed into blogs.

There are two sets of notes, because we broke out into two groups in order to keep the size of each group intimate.

Opening/Grounding

Break out Group 1

Check-ins, transitioning into open discussion

  • I work with Indigenous solidarity – not sure if white savior is an attitude or a behavior, trying to navigate complex boundaries around allyship working with Indigenous woman 
  • Studying psychotherapy and thinking a lot about what it means to be a white person in mental health, helping profession. Article by Rachel Naomi Remen about helping/fixing/serving (linked here), how are ways of service counter-narrative to white supremacist patterns, unsure what my tactics are – wanting to transform patterns. Drawn to meditation to intervene into the constantly needing to do more fast pace.
  • Conflict feeling as theater maker, much of community has lost work, lots of spaces where lots of white folks have more time than have ever had. What i’ve done and encourage others to do is to join rapid response mutual aid networks, supplies/donations, etc. After doing hours of this work, feel somehow released about having done something useful and can return to amorphous creative space. Direct care work feels useful, what else is less useful as i am not getting paid for it? Truth is the mutual aid networks are meeting bare minimum basic needs. Caught up in own wheel of what’s needed right now and rupturing separation. 
  • Work in food security, justice, access, where am i showing up now? Putting more resource toward BIPOC led food orgs, feeling tension that part of my work is to channel resources, yet why am i hiding from doing frontline work? What am i looking for in wanting to be seen being out there?
  • Work with food security for seniors and underresourced communities of color – something about our response to COVID that feel off. We have decided people need food and have been directing it to areas more resourced – mismatch, such pressing needs in this community. Our team approaches senior isolation with wanting to create cooking videos to each isolation, why is that what we have decided – not in relation to expressed needs.
  • Professional life and community organizing, these questions come up both COVID related and not. A client accused me of being a white savior, we will need to have convos. Around mutual aid, in legal field – ways that this pairing relates to the work is important, balance around real sense of urgency to do transformative work as people are dying, and not recreate same bullshit. No answers, want to keep thinking about it.
  • High school economics teacher, thinking about how so many of the traits Okun describes show up in curriculum and state standards, my school was quick to go virtual and we missed a lot of marks in surveying students understanding equity
  • In theater, most folks i know lost all income and what they are looking forward to. The whole perfectionist paragraph ripped me open, validating and so painful. Felt survivors guilt for still having a job. Fear of embodying savior role.
  • Pandemic has been like stewing in whiteness, privilege so apparent, what to do with privilege in the face of such intense structural inequities that are laid bare? Because of my own socialization, and lack of frontline connection to orgs in my community that are mourning the response, in white savior role by virtue of my position and location. Also survivor guilt is very present for me, have been working primarily with POC-led orgs so that the org i was working with would be much more representative and responsive. Because of white savior socialization, whatever i do is not enough – grapple with my own need to fix and save, versus own desire to be in authentic supportive relationship with people who i love and respect as colleagues and friends. Sense of urgency, with a grounding in contemplative practice, i try to slow down to take broader perspective how to use this moment to redistribute power and support agency and dignity? Huge pressure squeeze on my heart right now, grateful to be here.
  • Work with low income housing org, had coops struggling with people meeting basic needs, was bad before the pandemic, not having access to enough food – focused on distributing food and meet basic needs more reliably. Attitude and behavior combine. Feel self-conscious. Thanks for this space. 
  • Interesting difference between two scenarios shared, between being called on helping role and another with a corporate nonprofit doing help work without community input? 
  • Feeling is that our org is convinced that it is doing good work, brushing off people as being angry. 
  • Hard to maneuver through
  • The way the system is structured, to do my job i am cast in role as savior. Common pattern – system does not want to be self-reflective. Challenging.
  • Wanted to call out my feelings about being called out as a savior – brings up anger, and i need to process it with people
  • I realize i have moved too fast, not moving at the speed of trust – assuming there was a relationship where there wasn’t
  • Geographic segregation challenge where we are set up – some people in farmworker community, livelihoods decimated on a scale different than where i live. Grappled with living in one place and working in another – working for structural change. The ways we are divided from mutuality on race and class lines. Configured another way could be stronger source of mutual aid, revisioning community life, livelihoods, and interdependence.
  • Connected to that is the geographic dial-up of who i actually have access to and can build relationships without leaving my neighborhood, notion of urgency so bizarre with the ways time flows now – what is ending, no deadlines in sight with work, so i feel spasming awareness, lost total ability to assess urgency – how do we navigate it? How is this different now in this time?
  • The crisis is now, and has always been – lives on the line. Figuring out who is leading
  • Thread around relationship, information, stories.. Not flowing in reciprocal way – not all urgency or filling need is white supremacist – WS is I know what’s best, not responding to ppls autonomy – transactional, not transformative. Even if meeting goals, what does it mean to prioritize transformative relationships. So responses can be not patronizing. Not “I know what’s best for you”
  • Question around relationships – which ones am I moving myself into? Personal and organizations. BIPOC folks saying already in crisis, why now noticing? bc now affecting white ppl. Opioid crisis getting attention now bc of COVID. Double crisis being amplified. 
  • Echo that .. powerful open letters around disability – these are the accommodations we’ve been fighting for, and now the tsunami of accessible options. Who are we taking our cue from in practicing humility?
  • Feeling like crying – listening to pain and frustration, guilt – feel like we can all use work in humility – we all try to tread lightly in this arena. Hurts everyone that the system creates these dynamics – landmines. 
  • Appreciation for bring us back to feelings – easy to intellectualize
  • Been thinking about question – what is difference b/w .. young WOC at work said – lefty white ppl – should they be – bc they have had access, they have more free time and skills, we need them to do this labor for us, but they should be centering poor and POC voices – where am I positioned to offer something. Can’t figure out how to come to it not from a white savior mentality. I get to have a seat at table, but not sure what table it is. 
  • Want to further complicate the practice of mutual aid – networks I’m a part of are predominately white ppl distributing resources to POC. Eroding feeling of mutualism – not about building a relationship, about responding to a need. Bypassing our ind relationship bc they don’t need a relationship with me, they need me to drop off a mask. This land was stolen, so if mutual aid is about supporting each other. Extending timeline of relationship b/w our own transaction. 
  • Reparations – not always about how it happens, but that it does. Request made by those well positioned to name the need. Center in your intention. Best we can do in some circumstances as white ppl. Scrutinize what is your motive. Is there a way to address systemic harm. Can we repair future relationship. 
  • Figure out how this is mutual. Expanding
  • Voluntary exchange of resources. Reparations in order to get to equal ground so that there can be mutual aid. 
  • Global aid. Using you for my virtue. Without recognizing context of harm. To not have awareness. Giving is WS if it just reinforces that this resource is mine – giving in order to redistribute power., not hold it.  
  • How do I feel this, do the emotional work? The labor of the emotional work that white ppl need to do. 
  • The urgency notion – urgency can become toxic – both/and – relationship b/w urgency to do more, tied to notion of fear of being perceived as not doing enough. Tied to guilt/shame. 
  • Thinking of fear itself being a white supremacist notion. Trust as a counter to this.
  • Struggling with aspect of overwhelm, with social media, how to decide best places for my efforts – and battling with perfectionism in this as well
  • Where do i put boundaries, need is endless, dynamic seems not transformative. At times feeling used. 
  • Ways that urgency can override presence and ability to address things in the moment – to pause when something feels not right. 

Breakout Group 2

Check-ins, transitioning into open discussion

  • Deep dive into intense workaholism. Work has ramped up. Partner left due to a family emergency. Loneliness and terror about this moment is causing workaholism. Hard to allow myself to rest. Circumstances of urgency are a result of political conditions. I feel doubt, confusion and overwhelm. 
  • Excited to be here. I do internal equity work in my day job. I work in philanthropy which is a fucked up space of white saviorism. Come with questions and curiosities about how other people are thinking of this. Most of the money people are giving out was built off the backs of POC and oppressed people. Can that ever be clean or good? Sense of urgency is gnarly. So much need. I feel very strongly that we all need to care for ourselves too. How can I model taking a breath and having space, being spacious. How to be inclusive as to how I allow people to not be spacious. 
  • Burnt out and fried, feeling overwhelmed
  • Contradictions of philanthropy: wealth stolen from people of color, and now given Covid the sense of urgency is gnarly, there is so much need
  • Victor Frankl: between stimulus and response there is a space, and in that space lies the opportunity for growth and freedom, holding this question of how can I model taking a breath in my personal work and having space, being spacious
  • First time at WNC, trying to come to the workshops. I was born and raised in Oakland, trying to figure out my place in organizing and community. Trying to find a place and space where there is more intention put into talking about gender oppression and whiteness. I have been feeling really isolated recently, super common right now. Screens are very draining. Grateful for space. 
  • I am an essential worker, this is the end of my day. Curious about essential-ness and care-taking in this system. It is disproportionately care-workers, tend to be women or WOC. Unsustainable model for change. Pandemic has laid bare the inequalities. Curious around the beginning of the pandemic and ask how nervous they were – people were less nervous. People who lost their jobs seemed more worried. There is some level of engagement with systems of oppression or suffering that essential workers made their choice to do. All of the sudden there is an invisible force that is threatening my life that is showing up for certain people especially with more privilege. Many people have that experience more of the time. Sense of urgency around non-profits. Vibed a lot around workaholism in this moment. Seems misplaced in some ways. There is opportunity for space and for thinking. I am done with being informed, more interested in spaces like this. Less interested in the news. 
  • I’m a healthcare worker. Got into social justice tied to saviorism feelings. A lot of my friendships I’ve reflected on there is a savior aspect. Sense of urgency is also a massive one. Being pregnant has slowed me down and turned me more inward. I can work from home in public health, a lot of data analysis. I feel like I should be doing some thing and I can’t do anything, brings up saviorism. When it is ok to step in and act, led by communities requesting the help. White supremacy culture comes up int the workplace a lot. 
  • Work in issues around latin america at 2 different orgs. Saviorism involved. One org doesn’t have a lot of consciousness around issues of race, it is hard to introduce it. I teach ESL, and doing it online has been consuming me. Both the anxiety around the situation and trying to learn the technology means I haven’t been doing that much political work. Getting permission to do it right now. Trying to look inward and do things differently. 
  • I have been working constantly. I am a lawyer. I have worked 85 hrs in the last 7 days. White saviorism is showing up in my microcosm of my work, and then in general in the legal field. I have been doing a lot of advocacy, solidarity with people in detention centers and private ones in particular. The prison industrial complex has resulted in huge amounts of COVID in facilities. I notice white saviorism showing up and also I feel like I can’t stop. There is no stopgap. Philanthropy comments resonate – choices people make around donating is about wanting to be visible about what they are doing, an expression of white supremacy culture. 
  • I am exhausted, waking up crying. Birthday was monday. White saviorism doesn’t feel super hot in my world. Really appreciate everyone’s honesty. Lost my job, my partner and i realized she is an alcoholic. The ripple effects of pandemic have been htting me really hard. A lot my closest circle ar POC, living pay check to pay check as do I. Also I come from wealth. There is a lot of both and in my lived experience. Feeling pushed to the edge of not being ok, and then having access to food and shelter. My immediate family relationship is strained related to being in a queer realtionship. Tried to create a practice of embodied movement and writing every day because it feels overwhelming to be this lost. 
  • Im a nurse so i have been working, but not so much, because stopped all elective surgeries. I don’t feel overworked, but work is stressful. Probably not as bad in other places. Grateful I can still see people at my job. The ppe are not adequate. The union has been important for us. Individualism and fear of open conflict resonated. There is so much gossip at my job. A lot of young people with not that much emotional intelligence. Buffer zone professions. How to subvert the part of the role that is the enforcer in my role. Don’t want to feel like the cop of the hospital. 
  • First meeting, used to work in journalism and that got me into white saviorism, sense of urgency bound up in that. I am starting to be more aware of my nervous system, realizing how small my capacity actually is. As covid was hitting, i felt like i had no capacity. Then i started realizing i barely have capacity to do for my parents. Feels depressing and frustrating. I have very little to do and still feel like everything is tiring and making me sick. Trying to think in the long term. 
  • At a recent robin diangelo conference i thought i was somebody, i was really confronted by my ego. As an organizer everything is about taking action and moving people. I came to face that i am not doing a good balance of my work and organizing. Covid changed that. It has been a time to build the basics of my life, getting more sleep, going to recovery meetings, staying connected to people even just listening. I have been pausing everything that i have been doing. It has been uncomfortable. Perfectionism blows up my leadership. I don’t take the next action to stay involved and connected. Time passes and the opportunity starts to shift. It has been very uncomfortable not to do a lot of things, to not be responding and not have answers. 
  • How to trust ourselves around discernment of if we are engaging in patterns of white supremacy or in alignment with justice?
  • Discernment is such a life-saving skill to practice, how to discern when moving from a place of collective liberation vs. a place of white saviorism
  • If you’ve come to help me, you are wasting your time, but if you have come because your liberation is bound in mine then let us work together.  Lyla Watson
  • The pandemic affects us all differently because of systemic oppression and legacies, all of these systems must end and I know I need to be part of that; from a disability justice lens I can see more and more how I have struggled and suffered
  • Fuck pivot we need to transform!
  • Through Bay Area Transformative Justice Collective, learned that jumping into action as well as collapse is a trauma response, jumping into action and trying to fix it is also a form of a trauma response, also the feeling that you must fix everything right now?  Where did that come from?
  • In what ways are what we experiencing right now not trauma responses from historical trauma but trauma responses from actual violence in this present moment?
  • When is it liberatory to seek my comfort and when is it enacting white supremacy culture?  How can I discern what is good discomfort and what is retraumatizing?
  • Feels fucking urgent to dismantle systems of oppression, I feel the need to take care of myself very deeply in this work, the self-soothing and the noticing, the discernment around is this white saviorism to feel like we need to fucking do this!  Has felt urgent for a long time
  • Really love the questions: when is it liberatory, when is it white supremacy?  When is it helpful, when is it trauma response?  For me it feels like I need to build relationship and connections, need to be able to do internal work to be able to do relationship building work so that the “we” of taking action is the “we” beyond the sphere that I am supposed to stay in because of historical trauma
  • Feel urgency to move slower and think, don’t want to just react, want to talk to so many people and figure out what we need
  • Discernment – about somatic sensations
  • How do we trust our somatic sensations when one of the consequences of patriarchy is to disconnect us from our instinctual sense of knowing? 

Breakout groups returning together for Large Group Reportback & Closing

  • Relationship loomed large – questioning mutuality, how to take cue from others, the emotional work that needs to be done to show up, reparations
  • Appreciated the concept of the both/and of urgency – there is, in this moment, a real need to attend to the suffering, and also to question where that intersects with our history of white dominant cultural norms and white saviorism, this causes a missed opportunity to be part of breaking down and rebuilding a very broken system
  • An intimacy that is available – scary to say out loud, want to be able to be with other white folks, and especially other white queer folks, in a heart-filled way
  • Closing with a word and motion: What helps you feel alive and connected in this time?